Tuesday, December 25, 2012

.

can’t sleep.
I feel alive for the first time
In a long time
I feel like screaming
and running barefoot in the streets
and dancing in the streetlights.
When was I this positive?
It feels good.
And then the fear of this feeling dissipating kinda overwhelms me for a second
and then it disappears
as fast as it arrived

and I feel so





B/B 

A reflection.

I’ve not been
grateful.
I don’t know.
I have to think about this.

I want to lie in a field of grass in the 
middle of nowhere
And smoke a joint
And stare at the stars
And think.
About a lot of things that have to 
be thought more about.

x’mas y’all fuckers
B/B

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Sparklepoop.


The end.


Christmas is coming.
Not excited.
I just want to read a few more books.
And maybe
I don’t know.

Is it normal to masturbate when you’re 
depressed?

Full of questions.
It is what it is.

B.B

Friday, December 21, 2012

,

Brb busy dying. Alongside with everything else in this world.

B.B

Saturday, December 15, 2012

It’s all just a distant memory.
B.B

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

.


Moving forward with all the battle scars.
It's not about leaving the past behind,
But allowing it to walk beside me
With the good memories or the bad
The lessons learnt

Fuck all the shit
Fuck this all
It's time to live again
Breathe again
To look beyond the borders of my circumstances

Going to let myself fly, have the vulnerability to be seen
To be knocked down
To be mocked
To be loved
To be hated.


B.b

Cause fuck this shit that’s why.
Rushing through final projects.

If only
If only
I keep telling myself.

Goodbye
Goodbye
I keep telling myself.

B.B

Monday, December 10, 2012

just discovered this music artist,
’ Max Richter’ on spotify.

The moment I heard ’vladmir’s blues’
My heart stopped.

it’s one of those moments in life where
time seems unimportant,
and all that fills your eyes are colors.
And your chest hurts, in a beautiful,
sad way.

Although I feel suicidal, 
I don’t want to die.
Because it’s not my obligation to die.
If I wanted to die, I should’ve done so 

Much earlier. When I was 13 or something.

You meet less people.
You hurt less people.

A dream I had. I was wading out to the open waters naked.

With the bright moon ahead.

Thinking about how beautiful it was.

And then I reached a depth where I was drowning.

And I woke up.


B.B

Don’t you love it when I fall apart?
B.B

Friday, December 7, 2012

Fuck I’m a stalker

So. I have been stalking this guy.
I like.
I think he knows I’m stalking him.
Cause part of his information was hidden this
time.
Am I creepy?
I’m just a girl in love.
Is this love?
I don’t know.
I just want to look one more time
into his eyes.
Maybe if I do that
I will know 


B.B

Monday, December 3, 2012

The duck's poo poo and the river


 The end.

Today I didn't do shittttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt
I have an essay due.
Fuck it
I drew a fucking masterpiece
I'm going to be a fucking millionaire thanks to Queckers

B.B

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

;

 I'm about to shrivel up and die.
But who's 'I'?
Which 'I'?
Which one of 'I' is speaking for me now?

I'm just going to type selfishly here, may I?
I hate myself now
I don't know who I am
What do I establish myself upon?
Sadness?

My counsellor told me about EDMR
Not sure whether I want to undertake it
I don't feel like killing myself today.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Iadmit.
I’m depressed.
That’s why I’m going to see a counsellor.
I don’t trust them.
But I need to save myself.
I think.

I dont’ want to think anymore.
The music is never loud enough.
The sea is too far away.
I need to scream
where nobody can hear it.

I can’t sleep.
It’s probably just insomnia.

B.B

Sometimes I want to blow my head up.
B.B

Friday, November 2, 2012

Dinopenis

I know I didn’t post something yesterday
Something I said I’d do everyday
Ha
fuck me!
Anyway
Halloween has past
And my crush walked past me today
I want to talk to him
I want to kiss him soooo bad
He has the most sexiest lips ever
I should just type what I want to
Knowing that could warrant an arrest 
haha

I’ll just make do with strong imagination skills;)

Happy halloween you sexy muddahhuckahs x

B.B

Monday, October 29, 2012

Hurricane Sandy


And here's a shriveled leaf I found in the hallway.


And here’s my artistic creation from an eaten 
Pocky box. In lieu of Halloween,
Happy halloween folks *



B.B

Hello world out there*

Feels like I’m shouting to the
endless dark abyss
of the internet*

’Hello! you there!Yes you!’
Wow this must be fate!
Out of the million blogs
You landed on mine!

I plan to draw something small everyday
If I’m not lazy
but I usually am
so...hehe

come by when you have the time
this is all for now
B.B